Music for Sunday

We might not be able to touch the stars, but they are always there to guide us.

This song on Sunday is for the people who have touched my life. You are with me always, and for that I am forever blessed.

Shine Right Through by Correatown

Loving the Lake in New Hampshire

These are some of the many reasons I couldn't stop smiling after I returned from my annual family trip to Lake Winnipesauke in New Hampshire a couple weeks ago. From swimming every day to fishing to sailing to tubing and helping my niece water ski for the first time, the list goes on and on. The memories have stayed with me, fueling my days and the inevitable return to work. The water was absolutely beautiful and refreshing this year, inviting me to swim through a half-mile distance in the lake each evening. Despite not having much swimming time in at the local pool, I was so glad I still had the skills and didn't find myself floating belly-up at the end of it all!

I wouldn't give up this annual visit for anything. Some day, I'd like to spend my entire summer here, or at least a fairly good portion of it.

What do you think? Any votes you'd like to share on your own spot of heaven?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Risk Worth Taking?

The other day my daughter stated, "Whoa! Listen to this. When someone appears in your dreams, it's because that person misses you!." She asked if I thought this was true. After all, it had been tweeted from @MindBlowingFacts (or some such account on Twitter). "Does the world really work like that? Does that kind of energy between people exist?" Her blue eyes were wide with hope.

Wouldn't it be nice to believe that? Wouldn't it be even nicer, if it were true? Not knowing if her declaration was rooted in a new-found crush or a renewed interest in someone from her past, and not wanting to influence any possible actions on her part that might lead to some unrequited declarations of love, I opted to answer with a left-brained approach.

First of all, I told her, if you're dreaming of someone, then most likely, it is because either YOU'RE the one that misses them, or you have unfinished business, or you have a mind that tends to wander. There is absolutely no way of knowing or proving if it is also because they miss you, unless you want to explore that possibility by sounding like a crazy person when you ask them. Second of all, dreams happen all the time, but not all of them hold much meaning. For example, the other night I dreamed about a bag of Hostess powdered donuts. Yes, Hostess Donuts. They were sitting on a small round table in front of me. And an old friend in the dream was asking me if I wanted one. I am quite certain that while I miss those bite-sized powdered donuts from Hostess, it is doubtful that they were thinking of me. Even more doubtful that the old friend had any interest in my dietary preferences or inclinations at 3am.

But my daughter can be relentless. And she wasn't impressed by my donut dream. A couple hours later she said, "Guess what, Mom. Here is another Mind Blowing Fact. If you are thinking about someone all the time, then there is an 80% chance that the other person is thinking about you, too." With a laugh, she asked me what I thought about THIS tweet -- another one from her Go-To Source for Advice on Life on Twitter.

Looking at her, I wanted to proceed with my answer carefully. With some 40+ years behind me, and some 40+ years yet to be lived by her, I wondered whom she might be thinking about. If her crush were being returned. If there were any way of finding out if this Tweeted Fact might be true.

At first, I didn't have an answer to her second question. Was it likely that the main reason you thought of one person incessantly was due to the fact that they were also thinking of you? Was fate so sadistic that two people such as this would go on thinking of each other throughout the rest of their lives, being left with the other only in their thoughts? Or would one eventually break the silence and embrace the irrationality of their obsession by trying to bridge the gap and reach out? The writer in me voiced, Sounds like a great story for fiction!

As I said before, I wondered if I could shield her from the disappointment that sometimes follows from taking risks?

No. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't. In the end, my answer was simply this. "Anything is possible." Boring, I know. And not earth-shattering in any way. But I hoped it was general enough to help her nudge open the door to opportunity, if that was what she wanted. After all, I do want her take some risks. Some risks do lead to rewards.

As writers, we force our characters to take risks all the time. Should life be any different? IS life any different? In the end, I suppose not. Because in the end, fiction is written around characters that live through situations that readers can relate to; and characters face risks that readers should ultimately understand.

Does life have risk? I hope so. Although realistically, I hope it's the least foolish ones that gain our attention. Which begs the question, Where is the risk in that?

On that, all I can say is, I have absolutely no idea. I'm hoping that my daughter's Twitter friend will have the answer. And that she will be forging blissfully through life, happy with the risks she's taking on her own.

What do you think? Where lie the limits to the power of the mind? Where lie the limits to risk?

Living in a bubble

"Worst air in the nation!"

That's what the news has to say about Logan, Utah, the place I call home.

I've been living in Utah for more than 20 years. Although I enjoy skiing, sledding, snowshoeing, and other winter activities that northern Utah has to offer, getting through the cold months has always been hard for me due to the inversions. Inversions occur in mountain valleys, where cold air gets trapped under the lighter, warmer air that blows on by above with the jet stream. As time goes on, small airborne particles and droplets accummulate, and eventually, the entire valley is trapped in a smoggy cloud, too thick for even the sun break through.

Even driving during daytime can be treacherous.
This is what my morning commute looks like:

Gray. Gloomy. Not a ray of sunshine in sight.

Although I have to admit, the inversions can look kind of cool from a bird's eye view. Here is the inversion at Bear Lake from the top of the pass (yes, there are actually people living down in that cloud, along with a huge blue lake that fills the nearly the whole valley -- only you'd never know.)

Thankfully, I have family that visits from time to time. Last week, my entire family visited from NH and we enjoyed as much time as we could doing things out of the valley and out of the inversion, like skiing at the best kept secret on Earth - Beaver Mountain.

This visit was a special treat since I got to ski with my dad for the first time in a long time, and my nieces for the first time ever.

 And yes, that is a bright blue-bird sky behind us. That is what I wish for in the valley. Hopefully, we will see that kind of day down here soon!
 

Dear Santa, ...



Farewells

My grandmother passed today. Tipped her hat off to the world after 94 years. It's amazing to me to think that she lived nearly a century. In the little time we shared, I barely touched a part of her time spent on this earth. But when I was a part of it, we shared a lot--much in the way of conversation.

Talk,...yes, she could talk. She'd talk of dress shops, and farm trucks carrying vegetables, and huge sides of beef hung to cure in the upper room of her mother-in-law's farmhouse. She'd talk of walking across fields in winter for Thanksgiving dinner with friends on the other side of town, meeting the man who would become her husband, and boast of a sharp wit and accomplishments that only a woman of strong will and spirit could have done. I'll never forget the day she took me on a jaw-dropping tour of the place she worked in the capitol--all during a time when few women worked outside the home. She had a quick temper that she wasn't ashamed of, an equally quick laugh, and a fondness for pretty clothes, hats with attitude, and dinners out on the town.

She loved traveling, especially to see family and research her roots. Being a tall woman, she owned a big car. And I believe it tickled her fancy to travel in it with her sister, her aunt Kate, and other friends up and down the East coast. Her eyes sparkled when she reminisced her various adventures, especially if they involved moments when she had to stand up for herself--take a stand on being a woman, if the situation demanded it. And some situations did demand it. After all, she grew up and out of a time when the ideas of womanhood are different than they are now. At one time, she said she slept with a gun, and if she needed to, she wouldn't be afraid to use it.

She was a woman of the road, so to speak--molded out of a period of history that saw the progression from horse and wagon, to Model T, to Chevy Bel Air. I can only imagine how she must have felt commanding her own auto, making her own way, captaining her own freedom. Among the other women in my life, she was definitely a source that fueled my own drive, my own courage, my own strength to move out and into the world to find my way simply through her example of what it means to take hold of something and go with it.

She was also a bit of sleuth, and took pride in uncovering the family history--discovering secrets that old city files and libraries held for those that possessed tenacity and perseverance, like herself. She had a laugh that rang like jingle bells.... Well, maybe not quite,... but its sound definitely made you want to inch closer and find ways to hear more.

We shared a fondness for sweets, and we both had a weakness for Devil's Food chocolate cake. She was proud of her own recipe. Even her mother-in-law, Elizabeth Shade Kennedy, had recorded it in her own cookery diary. ...At the moment I'm at a loss for what else to say. I know that after what she went through in the past few years, she is in a better place. I'm glad she was a part of my life, and I'm thankful for all she taught me--both from the good and the bad. She lived what she knew. And I will miss her.

******************************************************

Gina,

You definitely left this earth too soon, but not without having touched many lives. Some of the best memories I have were created with you, my friend. It's strange to think how deeply those fresh, young experiences shaped who I would become. Because of that, they have been, and always will be, part of who I am. Now that your eyes are looking down from heaven, mine will be looking up, hoping to catch hints of that beautiful smile that could light the world.

Through a child's eyes

Recently, my son and I were having some sort of discussion centered on what we would do if we could do anything. Our ideas were far-flung. Learn to fly like a bird. Swim like a dolpin. Sail the world. Eat a billion gallons of ice cream.

Then, of course, I got silly and decided to dream smaller. More tiny. Focus on something I could nearly pinch between my fingers. Rather than wish for something as grandiose as sailing the world, I'd just get one freckle removed. Specifically, I'd get rid of the small blotch above my right eye. An age spot I seem to have acquired after finding too many ways to have fun outside.

My son looked at me like I was crazy. "Why would you want to do that?"

I asked why he was concerned--if he was worried I might actually get rid of it. If he'd miss that freckle when it was gone.

"Well, it's in the shape of a heart," he replied. "I like it."

In all the times I've spent looking in the mirror, getting ready for work, or wondering how I might lighten that blotch, I never realized there might be something good about it. Something to like. In that moment, as simple and trivial as it may seem, I actually felt better about myself. Some say I wear my heart on my sleeve. I never thought I might being toting a tiny bit of it above my right eyebrow.

Later, I began thinking about the pure and beautiful outlook kids have for the world.... What if more people made the effort to see things in a better light? Find the good in bad situations? Find the good in others and then share that opinion?

What if we didn't assume people whom we care about knew all the good things and reasons we have for liking them? What if we voiced those thoughts? Wouldn't that goodness go forth like a ripple?

I like to think it would.

Maybe life really does come down to the little things. Maybe changing the world for the better or helping people heal inside and out doesn't really take so much effort. Maybe it just starts with something as simple as telling someone you like that divet in their forehead, the curve of their smile, or that constellation of agespots streaming their way over their eyes.

Living, Loving New Hampshire

I've been back in Utah for a while now, land-locked, but adjusting to life without Lake Winnipesaukee out the back door. The week in New Hampshire was finished off with a few more "firsts."

First time handling the sailboat in strong wind for a couple hours without handing the reins over to dad.

First time water-skiing for daughter (woot!)

First time attending church on Bear Island--yes, we had to get there by boat, then hike the half mile to the church at the top of the hill.

First time water-skiing back home from church.

First time I actually considered the merits of lake-front property in the form of a rock. A rather large, unoccupied rock that sat on the wooded lakeshore. Any other rock in any other old place might not have value, but this one, I'm guessing is special.... It has a view. It offers a solid foundation for a house. It probably is available. The only problem is, it probably won't be mine unless I can dig up a sweet mill or two. You see, rocks--particularly those lakeside, or even within the lake, are prime real estate. Plenty of houses have been built on rock, like this one that happens to be its own island.... I'd like that. Some fine day.... Heck, if I had my rock, I'd be happy with a hammock--two poles sunk in the granite with a net strung between them. That'd be enough for me. For a while anyway. With a boat moored off-shore a wee bit away.

It's amazing that after going to the lake for so many years, I can still find so many firsts to experience.

As for the rest of summer, it's back to tackling projects--finishing up some old ones (hoping to get those manuscripts out the door) and jumping into some new ones. Haven't had much time to fish lately, but maybe I'll find a bit of time on the rafting trip next week that my school administrators are hosting. Idaho! Here we come! Sorry, kids, I think you'll enjoy a day of school without us. The sacrafices teachers have to make every now and then.....

Happy days!

New experiences

Vacation has been absolutely incredible. The weather is perfect and events of the past week so far have proved that we're never too old to experience new things. Some of my "firsts" are:

-- seeing five loons swimming on the lake together in front of our cabin

-- watching a big turtle climb up on the deck at the back of a boat to sun himself

-- taking a ride on dad's new sailboat....awesome! Love it.

-- finding out I really do know how to sail a boat, despite the doubts of all my years

-- witnessing the look on dad's face as my daughter cast his new rod and reel into the lake after he'd just taught her how to use it.... the only thing he forgot to tell her was "to hold onto the rod"...

-- fileting first pair of fishes, thanks to the idea of sons who want to eat what they catch

We'll see what the rest of the week brings us.

Signs of Summer

The official list.....

1. It may not seem possible that flip-flops on snow could be listed as a sign of summer, but for me, it is. After enduring an unreasonably long, cold, wet spring, my daughter and I found both sun and snow in Colorado over Memorial Day weekend. With a free day to do whatever we pleased before the soccer tournament, we headed up to Rocky Mountain National Park where they had plenty of snow and 90 degrees of heat--which is why we were wearing flip-flops.

It worked out great, actually, because I'd never hiked on snow in a pair of flip-flops before. And I never would have thought I'd enjoy it. But I did. Not only was it refreshing, but it tickled my feet, which made me laugh as I ran through it on tip-toes....all the better in my opinion.

2. Being chased by kids for a car wash....not that they had the wash-thing down--just the sign, which they found in a nearby field.

3. Boys on rope swings on the Blacksmith Fork River. Oh! to be young again.

4. Baseball......and more baseball. 4 days a week. Need I say more?

5. Movies! All the good ones are coming out. Prince of Perisa was fun. And so was Shrek. And Iron Man 2.

Which leads me to my next topic. I'll be brief....

Titles.

My daughter's friend recently commented that he went to see the movie, Killers. Based on the previews, he thought it was going to be a romantic comedy. Not having seen the previews myself, I thought he was kidding. Afterall, the movie was called, Killers. But no, he was serious. "Everyone wound up getting killed, in all sorts of horrible and different ways," he said. "It was bad. Not what I expected."

?!? Not what he expected !?!

Okay. So maybe the movie delivered what it promised. You can't be any more clear with a title like Killers. But in support of our seemingly clueless friend, I did see the preview after our conversation, and it really does look like the movie is going to deliever lots of laughs. So, until I see the movie myself, I guess I have to give him the benefit of the doubt and accept his surprise. Because it's funnier that way.

And besides, as I've discovered, there are movies that do seem to offer different content that what you would assume you're going to get.

For example, 1408 is not a historical drama (it's a ghost story). And The Secret Life of Bees is not a documentary.

Silly, I know.

One more thing....If America is missing the Statue of Liberty, I saw her in the back of truck on Highway 7, heading south, near Boulder. ... Just passing that information along, in case anyone was wondering.

Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day to all my friends and family...

Yeah, I know this post is early, but the week is a busy one, so I'm taking time now to send this one out; ...because I'm truly thankful for the sources of love in my life that flow like fountains.

Here are some favorite quotes.

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive." -- Anais Nin

"I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you." -- Roy Croft

"A single rose can be my garden...a single friend, my world." -- Leo Buscaglia

"Friendship isn't a big thing--it's a million little things." -- unknown

"Love is a condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own." --Robert Heinlein

"A hug is worth a thousand words. A friend is worth more." -- unknown

"A good friend is hard to find, hard to lose, impossible to forget." -- unknown

"If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you made me smile, I would have the whole night sky in the palm of my hand." -- unknown

"Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light." -- Helen Keller

"Love, actually, is all around us." -- from the movie, Love Actually

And because I enjoy writing and reading stories, I'll list some of my favorite books/movies touching on love and friendship.

Tristan and Isolde (James Franco)

Pride and Prejudice (Colin Firth)

The Lake House (Sandra Bullock, Keanu Reeves)

The Proposal (Sandra Bullock)

Titantic (Leonardo DiCaprio)

While You Were Sleeping (Sandra Bullock)

Love Actually (Hugh Grant)

The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks

The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare

Jane Eyre by Jane Austen

Vanishing Acts by Jodi Picoult

The Saving Graces by Patricia Gaffney

Happy Valentine's Day!

Bucket List

It's amazing how surprises and kindred connections can pop up in the most unlikely of places.

Last night I met with my writing group in Mantua, which happens to be one of my favorite spots in Utah. Not only is it beautiful--a small town sitting at water's edge--but a feeling of peace always seems to envelop me when I visit.

As a group, we always set goals for each other that need to be met during the two weeks that follow. While doing so, I mentioned one of my goals that I'd set for 2010, which was to learn the ins and outs of sailing. Turns out, going for a sail is on Claudia's bucket list for 2010, too. (She doesn't want to learn; she just wants to be a passenger enjoying the ride, which is all good.) And, to top that, Karen's neighbor has a boat and loves, loves, loves to take people out on it.

So, we came up with a 2010 bucket list for our writing group as a whole.

1. Go on writing retreat to Idaho cabin

2. Go sailing ... Mantua works! Time to look into boat rentals and such....Or, neighbors.

3. Go for a hot air balloon ride ... Park City, here we come!

4. Publish a book ... one for each of us!

It's a short list. Nothing too daunting, right? All we need is perseverance, and we'll get her done.

2010 Goals

So,... here we are in 2010. Rather than make resolutions, I'm making a list of goals. Things I'm planning on for the next few months. Things to look forward to and work toward.

1. Weekend with fellow writers at Bear Lake in January, where we'll get that next cookbook done! Hurrah! Hurrah!

2. Lots of skiing with kids in February....We should have more snow, right?

3. Weekend in Vegas with daugther in March. (Why Vegas so much? Vegas is far from my favorite place on the planet, but it's funny that I'm running out of fingers to count the number of times I've been there. I owe it mostly to soccer. And books, I guess.)

4. Get back to water. Fishing should be geared up in April.

5. Spend week helping friends build their yurt as soon as the snow melts. That power drill handed down from a friend should come in handy, so long as the tape holding the battery holds up.... Make mental note...bring tape.

6. Here's a resolution... learn to sail with confidence. I mean, really learn to sail, by reading books this winter, so that when I take the tiller with my dad this summer, I can get rid of that nagging fear that I'm about to knock everyone overboard. (Because I've been there, done that,... in Boston Harbor, while crossing the finish line in a sailing race. It wasn't pretty.... And although it was many years back, some things you never forget. And although I've sailed a boat many a time since then, I've never really thoroughly enjoyed it because of that nagging doubt that I don't know what I doing. So, for 2010,...here's to conquering self-doubt!)

Trials and Tribulations of a Loose Tooth

Okay, so living through the experience of loose teeth has never been dull in this household. From dealing with a daughter who would not pull or tug on any of her teeth until they were hanging by mere threads to coping with a son who would rip them out with fingers, or pliers if needed, at the first signs of them being loose, I'm now left with shielding the youngest of the three from their antics.

I've always hoped for a happy medium with him. Unfortunately, I don't think I'll get that. Since the older brother no longer has teeth to lose in his mouth, guess who he's turning his teeth-ripping skills on?

You guessed it. And said young son has fell victim in the past. And right now, that son has a loose tooth. And although he would very much like it out of his mouth, the memories of loosing his last tooth still burn a little too brightly in his mind. And mine.

I mentioned pliers. And I was totally serious, although my olders son's fingers have served pretty well without them as a pair of vice grips when it comes to pulling a tight tooth. This son has also resorted to other adventureous tactics--tying strings to the bathroom door, then slamming it shut with his foot (it worked on the second try--although why and how he would have repeated this feat a second time after a failed first attempt, I have no idea). And those strings remained until the doorknobs were recently changed out. There have also been heavy objects launched off the top of the stairs (tied to his tooth, of course). And who knows what else. His younger brother's fingers, I think.

Anyway, I mentioned the last tooth extraction of my youngest son. He'd had a loose tooth, and his older brother found out about it. An older brother, who knows the ins and outs of the capitalistic advantages of the tooth fairy. So, when the youngest complained about his loose tooth, he said, "Let me get it out for you."

At first, his younger brother refused, but after a bit of prodding along the lines of, "You want money, don't you? Then lie down on the floor and let me pull it out!" he finally agreed to have some help. Help that began with him lying on the floor and offering up his mouth, while his older brother straddled him and started pulling.

Yes, he pulled. Pulled and yanked and pulled some more. And he didn't stop, even though his brother writhed in pain and screamed for mercy.

Finally, the tooth yielded. My older son held it up with pride, asking, "Did I get the right one?"

The younger could only hold his mouth, and nod, and hope that he had.

"Then, that'll be a buck, please."

Yeah. The older, magnaminous brother charged his younger brother a buck. A fee for his services. Which could be paid after the tooth fairy's visit.

How much does she usually leave? A buck.

Ah, my enterprizing young sons....

We'll see what happens this time. Since my youngest has come to me many times in the past 24 hours about his tooth, I kind of get the feeling that he wants me to take care of it. He probably thinks I won't charge him.

Good thing I got that new tool kit from my folks this year. I might have my first opportunity to dig into it.

Happy New Year!

Yes, Happy New Year.

I won't tell you who's in this picture, but I think it says it all, as I'm sitting here staring down the dawn of 2010.

So, I've found that I like snow again. All it took was getting outside to enjoy it by doing something fun. Like skiing at the local Beaver Mountain. All the locals have been complaining there wasn't enough snow, yet--including some folks I know who work there--but wanting to get out of the valley for a change of scenery and better air, I went.

At first, I was going solo. Daughter was sick, sons were at a sleep-over and were not interested in leaving friends behind. But by the time they got home, saw me packing up, heard me talking about 6 inches of new powder, they decided to come along. Which made the day so much better. It's more fun to ski with someone else, especially a couple of boys who know how to tear it up on the slopes. And I was able to keep up, thanks to the fitness training my daughter has kept me working at for the past many months as she's worked to stay in shape for soccer. It was a great day. We found plenty of untracked powder, and even the numerous branches sticking out through the snow weren't a problem. We just turned around them.

Cheers to more of that fluffy white stuff.

Happy New Year!

The Lights at Temple Square in Salt Lake City...

were beautiful last night.

We started the evening with A Christmas Carol, which was performed at the Hale Center Theatre in West Valley City. Highly recommended! Then we feasted at The Macaroni Grill in Salt Lake, and finished the evening with a walk through Temple Square. It was incredible! Every little branch supported a string of lights. My favorite spot was the reflecting pond with the illuminated floating bubbles.

That said, I'd like to remind everyone of the four basic food groups at Christmas. Candy, candy canes, candy corn, and syrup. ...Anyone know what movie this is from? It's one of my favorites.

And, to top things off, my youngest has decided to put Santa to the test this year. When he sat on his lap last week, he asked for a squirrel.

Yes, a squirrel.

A real, live, teeth-and-claws-squirrel.

His older brother, who visited with Santa next, asked for a pony and a girlfriend. To which Santa replied, "You're too old for the first, and too young for the second." Unfortunately, he didn't give the youngest a witty reply, so Christmas morning will be interesting, unless Santa finds a way to bait and trap some furry rodent while traveling over Wyoming or other nearby state that hosts such critters.

Happy Holidays!

Good Times

It's been a while since we met, but holidays and other events have a way of bringing friends back together, especially friends who love to talk about books (and many other things--some of which I could never talk about here--but that's what makes them so fun).

We met at local restaurant and were treated to many surprises of the evening, including dessert on the house and a bottle of wine bought for our table by a friend of a friend. Thank you, Paul! The 7 Deadly Zins is a new favorite vino. And thank you, Ted! You helped make the evening special.

I love these ladies. They are one of the many blessings in my life.

I don't know what I'd do without them.

Happy Thanksgiving!

So, it's the day after we devoured turkey and stuffing with all the fixings, and I'm still feeling incredibly blessed. I do have much to be thankful for, even though some days I feel completely overwhelmed. And here it is, Black Friday, a day I opted not to shop and woke instead to see why I'm the luckiest mother in the world.

I'm thankful for two boys who will wake themselves at the crack of dawn to make sure they can surprise me with breakfast in bed. (I tend to be an early riser.) It was one of my favorites. French toast, a mini ham and cheese omelet, and OJ. And they did it all on their own.

I'm thankful for a daughter who tells me she loves me and that I'm her best friend. A daughter who showers me with hugs and plays uplifting, empowering songs when I need them, even though I'm not telling her I do. A daughter who stands by me in the kitchen before and after the Thanksgiving meal to help with preparations and clean-up. A daughter who hands me her size 3/4 jeans because she thinks I can wear them, after I see that mine are too big and no longer fit. (I won't tell you if hers fit, though!)

I'm thankful for family and friends who show their support and share their love and help keep me focused on my hopes and dreams. I'm thankful for a wonderful home, good schools that help educate my children, the means to put food on the table, and strong health. I'm thankful to have full days to enjoy, the sun when it shines, and a future that keeps me looking forward. And I'm thankful to live in a state and a country that affords us so many freedoms to do the things we do.

Happy Holidays!

Survivor!

Yes, I survived. Or, rather, we. My daughter and I, when we rode the Big Shot on top of the Stratosphere in Las Vegas last weekend.

We were there for the Las Vegas Mayor's Cup soccer tournament that her team was playing in, and a friend had suggested we take that ride on the Big Shot, or at least get to the top of the Strat for the view. Lucky for us, these plans became part of the team's agenda for Saturday night, since they didn't have an early game scheduled for Sunday morning.


But as the captured Kodak-moment shows, even 4Gs of being shot 160 feet upward at 45 miles an hour isn't quite enough to zap my brain into motion. It took more than a few moments for me to realize, that yes, we were indeed moving, possibly and quite quickly, toward death. And by the time I was in full comprehension of my experience--that I may not survive--the zero-G's bestowed on us as we plummeted back downward kept me from vocalizing any of the sheer terror I felt in comprehending that there really was NO WAY off until it was over.

But of course, once it was done, I kind of wished I could do it a second time. And maybe a third.... What's up with that?

All in all, getting away to Las Vegas was great. The sun was warm enough to kiss my skin, the soccer games well-played and enjoyable to watch, the watershow at the Bellagio perfectly timed to impress upon my teenage daughter that I really might have clue as to what we were doing as we toured the strip, and the singing bus driver on route to the terminal was fabulous enough to end the weekend with a smile. Although the singing vacuum cleaner--i.e., the fellow who was riding a motorized vacuum cleaner at the SLC airport while singing Kumbaya upon our return--left me a bit perplexed over the intricacies of human nature.


As for daily life, the sun and warm weather have returned for at least a few more days in northern Utah before the snow truly starts to fly for good. Although I like to ski, here's hoping the sun will stick around for a little while longer.

Finding Inspiration in Kokanee Salmon

A couple weeks ago I took my kids to see the bright red kokanee salmon making their way upstream in the Little Bear River above Porcupine Reservoir. As I watched these beautiful fish swimming among the rocks in the shallow water, I struggled with wondering what sort of inspiration could be drawn for both life and writing from a journey in which a fish returns to its hatching grounds after a few short years of life solely to spawn and die. What drives that undeniable urge? And why?

Although as humans, we're nothing like fish, I've come to realize that in some ways we may mirror this behavior when we allow ourselves to give in to that gut-wrenching pull toward something or someone we like in hopes that the journey forward will lead us to a place that resembles our roots, shapes the foundation of our soul, and sharpens our senses to the point of knowing what it means to truly be alive. So that at the end of it all, we can say, yes, life's ultimate journey was worth it, even if we did get battered among the rocks along the way. Because feeling something is the first step toward believing, and believing in something provides the purpose for moving forward, even if we're swimming against the current and dodging all sorts of debris coming our way.

For me, I want to believe that the ultimate journey will have been about love. I want to be able to say that I held on to it when it was found. That I did everything I could to make it grow, and that in doing so, in sharing it with those around me, made my corner of the world a better place.

Last week, I came across a quote I liked from Souza. Here's part of it:

Love as though you've never been hurt before....Live as though heaven were on earth.